As part of this year’s service learning trip to Cap-Haitien, Haiti, the Laurier ENACTUS team (an organization based on applying business skills to address social needs) has been spending time at a partnering nutrition centre. The nutrition centre is a hub for many services and programs, with an aim to develop the capacity and skills of young mothers in the long term, while addressing nutritional deficiencies in their babies in the short term.
Over the past year, our small team (three Laurier Business students and one faculty member) has spent time researching improvements to an existing microfinance program at the centre. In just a few days of being here in Cap, we are really appreciating the critical importance of presence on the ground to really LISTEN to the concerns and needs of people we are working with, and to understand broader context. Skype calls don’t always do this justice!! So we decided to take a step back, and put our research on microfinance aside.. just for now!
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Recently, civil rights issues in the states and here in Canada have caused me to think a lot about empathy. Why is it that some people seem to express and feel empathy more easily than others? Why do we tend to jump to a defensive stance during challenging conversations? Most importantly, what does this have to do with schooling?! For this last question, I turn to my favourite escape, a quote by a respected person: Humans aren’t as good as we should be in our capacity to empathize with feelings and thoughts of others, be they humans or other animals on Earth. As the post-secondary school year winds down here in Canada, this post is dedicated to grads, past and present.
Here are five qualities to live by, and some life lessons from a few inspiring personalities. (Also, watch Ellen Degeneres' commencement speech at Tulane - you will enjoy every minute!): I love Tina Fey. There is something about her clever style of humour, her quirkiness, and honesty that make me want to be the woman’s friend. Not to mention her amazing impersonation of Sarah Palin or the gem of a show she created in 30 Rock (some Jack Donaghy highlights here). But one of my favourite contributions that Fey has given the world boils down to two simple pages from her book “Bossypants”, in what she calls “Tina Fey’s Rules of Improvisation that will Change your Life”. She starts with the idea of open-mindedness: The first rule of improvisation is AGREE. Always agree and SAY YES. When you’re improvising, this means you are required to agree with whatever your partner has created. So if we’re improvising and I say, “Freeze, I have a gun,” and you say, “That’s not a gun. It’s your finger. You’re pointing your finger at me,” our improvised scene has ground to a halt. But if I say, “Freeze, I have a gun!” and you say, “The gun I gave you for Christmas! You bastard!” then we have started a scene because we have AGREED that my finger is in fact a Christmas gun. A recent study undertaken by researchers from Harvard and the University of Virginia had surprising results: more often than not, men would rather give themselves a slight shock treatment, than have to sit alone with their thoughts. (This "Wired" news article summarizes the study’s findings as does this article from the University of Virginia).
People argue that we need to be able to multitask; that we are social beings; that of course people feel like they are losing it when they are left alone to do nothing - this IS torture! Or is it? Is there value in removing stimulation once in a while to deal with ourselves? I touched on this in an earlier post; even students can benefit from learning to deal with boredom. I recently spent a week living in silence with strangers. At first, it did feel a bit torturous for my mind (“What am I doing here? Why does that guy slurp his tea in the most irritating way possible? I should have chosen the yoga retreat!”). But after giving it a fair shot, I will say that the practice of mindfulness, and “insight meditation” or Vipassana opened my eyes to some simple (but not always easy) techniques to live with more presence and start to deal with the mind. As Jon Kabat-Zinn (professor of Medicine and founding Director for the Centre for Mindfulness at UMass) writes: Recently, I've been coming across posts and people who believe in a "free" approach to education, allowing kids' natural exploration guide their own learning, and having them do this outside the confines of a formal school. I like this in theory; but in practice I wonder about the competencies parents need to guide this experiential learning. Continuing on from my post on the ‘right kind of education’, Krishnamurti places a lot of emphasis on the role of both parents and teachers. With the challenge of developing integrated individuals, parents and teachers need to be integrated themselves. One of my favourite Krishnamurti quotes sums this up: What we are in ourselves is much more important than the traditional question of what to teach the child. He goes on to explain that our fears from childhood are often not dispelled by parents nor teachers, which is dangerous as we grow up with these fears dominating our judgment and preventing deeper learning: ..there cannot be intelligence as long as there is fear. Fear perverts action and is one of the causes of self-centered action.. To be without fear is the beginning of wisdom, and only the right kind of education can bring about the freedom from fear in which alone there is a deep and creative intelligence. Krishnamurti also boldly calls parents out for failing to care enough to transform society, and instead continuing the status quo:
"I wish he would just grow a pair" - apathy and empathy in Gaza, and the role of education7/20/2014 Today, I decided to ‘unfollow’ a friend on my Facebook newsfeed due to her crude comments towards the attacks on Gaza. With friends across religions (and no religion at all!) it was unsettling to have to hide her posts.
This woman's post was about how she wished her leaders would grow a pair (it was actually along the lines of someone lending him a pair) so they could fight off all the critics and and stick to their attack on Gaza. How could a smart, well travelled and ‘educated’ woman, be oblivious to the killing of innocent women, children and men, that was happening? I won’t comment on the politics and so-called leaders who are responsible for these killings (According to the Globe and Mail, over 400 Gazans have been killed in two weeks, along with 18 Israelis). But as an educator, I will say that key stakeholders in education have a significant, albeit more general, role in all of this, especially if we accept Krishnamurti's assertion that education's purpose involves how we relate to ourselves and one another. Parents perpetuate their own fears (and hatred) by passing them on to the next generation; schools and teachers typically fail to push students to analyze different sides of an issue and to be aware of what is happening right now, in the real world. The curriculum and textbooks don’t often promote media literacy over a passive acceptance of ads, assertions, and propaganda. Recently I stayed up into the wee hours, catching up with a close friend (check her out at happygut.ca). Curled up on her couch, we talked about everything from funny dating stories to the amazingness of mothers. Then we somehow got to talking about how different we often feel relative to others. I find that people generally accept different as ‘cool’.. to a limit. Once you really push tradition or social norms, most people try and exit the conversation (hopefully with a panic moonwalk a la Nick Miller to seal the awkwardness)! This reminded me of how important it is to find your ‘pack’ - those people who acknowledge your talents, who support you but call you on your nonsense, who get you and your differences, who share your true values. In one of my favourite books (Women Who Run with the Wolves), Clarissa Pinkola Estes talks about the importance of finding one’s pack, using the story of the Ugly Duckling. That poor duck is laughed at by all the other ducks, left to fend for himself, searching and wandering, until he finally realizes he isn’t an ugly duck after all. In fact, he isn’t even a duck! He’s a beautiful swan! Once he finally finds his pack of swans, he experiences life and power like never before. For me, finding my pack has been so important for my learning. It’s hard to fully express yourself, if you aren’t associating with people who really ‘get’ you. If you aren’t fully expressing yourself, you aren’t doing justice to your learning (and living) potential. The encouragement and acknowledgement you get from your chosen pack is critical to moving beyond mediocre, beyond normal. The great thing about this is that people in your true pack come from so many different areas of your life, different ages and stages. With the recent passing of the great storyteller, teacher and activist Maya Angelou, I checked out an interview she recently had with George Strombo. In a similar vein to the Ugly Duck story, she speaks about equality: I was always amazed at people’s shortsightedness. How can you think that you can plant an orange seed, and (then) go out and harvest onions..? Damn, Jack! You should know better than that! Here’s hoping none of us become as shortsighted as the ducks or these harvesters; that instead, we all find our packs and make original contributions!
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AuthorA passionate educator.. on a quest for a schooling model to love! Archives
August 2017
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